As the nation grapples with economic woes and the never-ending fight for a brighter future, a question of utmost importance looms overhead: should the U.S. government nationalize Nintendo of America? The answer, my fellow Americans, is a resounding YES. At first glance, this might seem like a perplexing idea. But, fear not, for there is no better way to unite our great nation than by ensuring every citizen has the inalienable right to a Nintendo DS handheld.